Sunday, April 13, 2003

Heathenistic weekend.
Well this was a pretty a typical weekend in the life of a bachelor. Friday started out as usual work was long on my hangover, well dragged ass anyways. The usual night out go to the local bar have dinner and quite a few beers.
I was utterly tired until I got home at 2 am, and then my second wind kicked in. So I called Eelnahs and griiled out. I talked to Shannon for about two hours and laughed my ass off.
Thank God for friends like her, I called at 2 am and she didn't even threaten my life. Note to self she may kill me next time though.
S A T U R D A Y
What do you do when you know you have to work a 5 am on Sunday. You get up early get the serious stuff done (yard work), then you start partying about 1. My buddy Mikey came in from Neola and whacked down 6 of my beers in the last 25 minutres it took me to finish my yard. What a dick, just kidding he bought more later. Mikey and I took off to madness land a place full of beer and heathen.
This is usually a result of to many bachelors being heathen and not caring about the "Women". We had to stop by a buddy of ours to get a couple of roadrunners. We were in between waterholes, and didn't want to get dehydrated.
Our buddy Todd is a Hoonyer, he is whacko, I mean totally Gonzo mad. We spent 30 minutes there and when I left my gut hurt from laughing.
Saturday afternoon He-man woman haters club hanging out grilling, beer drinking and professional croquet. When you have no desires to get in a relationship and you add 6 other guys that think the sme you become creative. In our brilliant mind storms of what to do most of which involves what can we do as we drink. We have become excellent croquet players.
We don't do any stupid things like the rules say to. It's more like the PCPA the Proffesional Croquet Players Association. We set it up like a course and go to town. Mostly we just get drunk and try to send the other guys flying.
Shannon got to hear a few of us talk I think she thinks we're crazy. Maybe a little, but "I'll never tell".
After a strenuous game of croquet Strip clubs become the topic. Hamburg, Iowa becomes our destination of choice at arround 9. For some strange reason I'm elected the driver. Next thing I know after a 45 minute drive to "Shotgun Geneez" and a forty five minute drive home it is 2 am.
I worked from 5 am till 9 am today I hate myself and my heaten friends, well til the next time.

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