Lost memories
My mother passed away when I was eleven from Pancreatic Cancer. In trying to block out alot of the pain from that I also blocked out alot of memories. Along the roads of life I have met many a person who knew my mother.
They all smile when they talk about her. Recently an old neighborhood bar was taken over by a new manager who has been restoring it back to it's glory days. This process has brought back alot of old timers or regulars from back in the day.
Many of these old timers grew up the South End, my neighborhood. The same neighborhood where my mother grew up.
The past two days I've heard more good stories about my mother than I have heard in years. I also have had a rush of memories that I guess I supressed with the pain. It's amazing just how many people my mother touched.
I was told that she was as tough as they came but had the heart of a saint. This of course I new. I also heard about how she could rebuild any motor, and weld just about anything.
I remember my mother always being active and I do remember her and my aunt welding boatlifts for my grandfather.
I just wish that it wouldn't of taken this long for me to remember and to hear so much about her.
Eighteen years is a long time to try to catch up. This afternoon I'm heading north again.
It's been all too serious around here lately, I just need to unwind.
6 Comments:
great post! And it is amazing how one person can touch so many lives, especially when it is your mother, as we tend to see our parents in that parental role, and to hear stories that puts them into more human roles, it always amazes me. We all handle grief in different ways, I lost my father when I was 15, and I had major supressed feelings, until my mother died last year, and I felt like I was grieving for two people.
hang in there, kid.
Sometimes memories come back when you're ready to remember and deal. In the meantime - taking a step back from intensity and just being frivolous/unwinding really helps.
Your mother sounds like a wonderful lady. She raised a a very insightful, thoughtful son. I agree with Bunny, sometimes memories come back when they are ready to.
Ugh - I lost an uncle to that. Terrible illness. But I'm glad to hear that you're spending time with people who knew your mother. Hopefully you'll continue to do so whenever you can, keeping her memory alive by seeing the lives she touched.
Sorry I sound like a damned Hallmark card, but it's true. I look forward, later this month, to getting to know my mom's oldest friend. I figure I'll find out some stuff about my mom I wouldn't learn otherwise.
I am so sorry that you lost your Mother at such a young age. Cherish your memories.
Post a Comment
<< Home